


Say You Love Me

by aquariasmattel



Category: RuPaul's Drag Race RPF
Genre: Age Difference, Eventual Smut, Fluff, M/M, Mutual Pining, Slow Burn, pre-dragrace
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2018-08-23
Updated: 2019-01-31
Packaged: 2019-07-01 12:05:14
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 6
Words: 14,717
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/15773760
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/aquariasmattel/pseuds/aquariasmattel
Summary: Max's mind is constantly on Aquaria, the rising star of New York’s drag scene. He can't seem to shake him, but Aquaria doesn't seem to want him to.





	1. Aquaria

**Author's Note:**

> Heyyyy. This is my first drag race fic I've ever posted, so please be nice. I know it's a short chapter, but I'm just going to post the first chapter and see how it goes, and then I might post a second! Happy reading!

She was new. But Max had heard of her before: “the rising star of New York’s drag scene”. Aquaria. Max didn’t know shit about zodiacs, but the name seemed to suit her quite well. The local scene had been buzzing about her for months now, rumours flying around, each one as ridiculous as the last. At first Max paid no attention to them, he didn’t know her, so why should he care? It was when a little birdy told him she was the ‘drag-daughter’ of Sharon Needles, that Aquaria finally caught Max’s attention.

At first it pissed him off, how such a young queen was already so well known within the drag community. He had been performing in drag for the last four years, and he was only starting to make an impression now. Aquaria literally posted maybe five pictures on Instagram and everybody was raving about her. Max couldn’t help but feel animosity towards the girl, she has everything he wanted and she got it in a quarter of the time.

He followed her on Instagram, and then on Twitter. With every new update and picture, Max’s interest grew, until it got to the point that he had notifications turned on for when she posted – not that Max would admit to that, because he’s “not creepy in that way”. She was the perfect kind of inspiration he needed to polish his own drag character, Brianna Cracker. Max nearly had a heart attack the day she followed him back.

There was no denying that she was gorgeous. Her make-up was flawless, her lace front was snatched, and her costumes were the most conceptually and visually appealing that Max had ever laid eyes on. It didn’t help that she was also very attractive out of drag either. Each new look that she presented sent a punch straight to Max’s gut. But why? He chalked it up to jealousy, maybe even a little bit of admiration, because what else could it be?

* * *

Max new he was fucked when he first saw Aquaria perform live. He was sitting in his local gay club with Chris, his drag mother – lovingly nicknamed Bob, on his first day off in weeks. For once he was glad to sit back and watch the other queens perform instead of being back stage, sweating his make up off, and trying to share a shitty desk fan with three other girls.

Max fiddled with his phone most of the night with a half empty cocktail in hand, not really in the mood to talk, when Bob nudged him. “Hey, did they just say Aquaria? Isn’t that the baby queen you’re obsessed with?”

“I-I am not obsessed with her,” Max stuttered, his cheeks taking on a rosy glow, thank god for bad quality club lighting. “How could I be-”

His words were cut off as his eyes snapped to the stage, the low and melodic sounds of music cut through the club and the lights dimmed. Then she was there, on stage, in all her glory.

Aquaria.

She was more beautiful in person, more beautiful that Max could even imagine. Her body swayed and moved in perfect harmony with the music, and her mouth curved around each lyric perfectly, it almost looked as if the voice was coming out of the new queen herself. She looked so young. How old was she? Twenty-two? Twenty-three? She had to be at least twenty-one, she couldn’t have gotten into the club otherwise.

Her number seemed to go on for a lifetime but too quickly all at once. Max wanted it to go on forever. The club around him cheered and hollered, throwing bills at the young queen, whilst Max just sat stoic, his eyes glazed staring at Aquaria. She walked off stage. Max felt a pang in his chest.

“She’s really something, huh?” Bob elbowed Max, breaking him from his dream like trance.

“Wh-what? Oh yeah, yeah. She-she was really good,” Max mumbled, his eyes still glued to the stage.

The night carried on. More and more queens performing and absolutely killing it – it was New York for heavens sake, all the queens were amazing – but Max found himself praying to G-d for Aquaria to come back on stage, just one more number and he would be satisfied. He knocked back drink after drink, silently willing himself to just forget the young queen.

She came out again, her wig a different colour and her outfit showing a little more skin. This number was just as upbeat and entertaining as the last. Max was once again hypnotised. Bob watched Max stare transfixed on Aquaria, a small smile on his face. He knew his friend, far too well for his liking, and he knew that his friend was whipped. This baby-queen had Max wrapped around her dainty finger, and they hadn’t even met yet.

The smile dropped from Bob’s face. This Aquafina-Aqueefna-Aquaria girl, whatever her name was, was going to break Max. Bob didn’t know how he knew, but he just did. He sipped his drink and averted his eyes back to the stage, stewing over how he could protect his friend. Aquaria’s number ended again, and Max slumped in his seat, another punch to his stomach left him winded almost as she exited the stage and another queen took her place.

“You want another?” Bob asked Max, pointing to Max’s sixth empty glass.

“Jus’ water,” He slurred, the alcohol already affecting his speech. God, he had become such a lightweight. But tonight, was not the night to test his limits. “Don’t worry, I’ll get it.”

Max stumbled from their table in the corner to the bar. His arms caught the bench of the bar before he could fall flat on hiss ass, and he slid into a seat. Minutes passed as Max tried to gain the attention of at least one of the bar tenders, sure it was a little busy, but he had been sitting here for ages and he just want some _goddamn water_ -

A graceful hand landed on Max’s shoulder and a warm body pressed up against his back. “Excuse me,” a soft voice said, all three bartenders looked in their direction. “Can I please have a vodka-raspberry, and my friend will have…?” The voice trailed off. The bartender stared at Max, and it took him a moment to realise that it was him the voice referred to.

“Water-” He croaked out, “just some water, please.”

The body behind him slid into the vacant seat to Max’s left. It took him a few moments to build up the confidence to finally face them, but nothing could have prepared Max for the shock that he felt when he turned and saw Aquaria sitting beside him.

“Hey handsome,” Aquaria drawled, sitting out of drag and staring right into Max’s eyes. He blinked once, twice, three times. Nope, Max wasn’t hallucinating.

“Hi?” Max was surprised at how his voice didn’t break.

“Hi,” Aquaria smiled. Max’s insides melted. “What’s your name?”

Max’s heart dropped. She didn’t recognise him. Sure, Max didn’t post any pictures of himself out of drag on any social media, but people still tended to recognise him. He shouldn’t be surprised though, how could such a goddess like her recognise an average drag queen like himself?

“My name is-” Max started.

“A vodka-raspberry and an ice water,” The bartender cut in. “Can I get you anything else?” The bartender stared at Aquaria like he was hungry, his eyes were heavy with lust. Max wanted to gag.

“No, thank you.” Aquaria answered. Max was surprised to see that her attention had not wavered from him for one second. “It’s hot in here isn’t it? Or am I just imagining it? I feel like I’m drenched in sweat.”

“Yeah, it is a bit hot.” Max muttered, his eyes raking up and down Aquaria’s lean body. She was drenched in sweat, his white shirt clinging to his chest and toned arms. It wasn’t fair, how could he be so absolutely stunning in and out of drag? Aquaria was going to drive Max mad, but he couldn’t find it in himself to look away.

They talked for over an hour, about the queens that performed, about the community, about music, art, books. Max had never felt so comfortable with someone in such a small amount of time. It was nearing two in the morning when the crowd in the bar started to quite down a little bit.

“I know this was so rude of me, but I don’t think we ever caught each other’s names…?” Aquaria said, biting the corner of her lip. Max smiled.

“I’m M-”

“Cracker!” Bob called, stumbling towards the pair.

“Cracker?” Aquaria laughed.

“And you’re Aquaria,” Max said, a grin over taking his face at the rosy glow that blossomed on Aquaria’s cheeks.

“You can call me Giovanni, or just Gio.” Aquaria said, watching her hands as they twisted in her lap.

“Gio… I like it.” Gio’s head whipped up at the sound of Max’s voice caressing his name, his face broke out into a beaming smile.

“Cracker.” Bob had finally reached them. “Cracker, it’s time to go home, woman,” Bob’s words were slurred and slow.

“Okay, I’ll call us a cab,” Max sighed and stood up. Just as he hooked his arm under Bob’s, Bob turned around and faced Aquaria.

“You-” _Oh God_ , “You’re that queen my little Crackerttack is so obsessed with.” Gio sat shocked staring at Bob while Max flushed a bright red.

“I’m not – _I’m_ not _obsessed with you,_ I just follow you on Instagram and Twitter, and you’re an amazing make up artist and dancer. And, and-” Max sighed. “I’m going to shut up now.”

Gio laughed a beautiful laugh, and Max fell deeper. “It’s okay, honestly.” Gio twisted in his seat and stood up, standing as close to Max as the space would allow. He leaned down and whispered into his ear, “It was lovely meeting you Crackerttack, au revoir.” With a wink and a small smile, Giovanni walked away.

Max stared after him in a daze, until the dead weigh that was Bob hanging off his arm, called for him to hurry up and move.

* * *

As Max got ready for bed that night he knew only one thing: he was fucked.


	2. Liked

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sorry it took so long to give you chapter two! It took me way too long to decide whether or not to continue, so here we are. I hope you enjoy it.  
> Also, I don't have an editor, so all mistakes are mine x

_He knew my name. He knew who I was._

Giovanni couldn’t contain his smile as he walked away. A warm flutter filled his stomach. He looked behind him one last time to see Miz Cracker handling the guy that interrupted their conversation, a look of concentration and frustration on his face.

 _God he was cute_. Giovanni smiled as he practically skipped to the curb outside to find a taxi.

Brianna Cracker _knew_ who _he_ was. Gio knew that she followed him on Instagram and Twitter, but to have it reiterated in such a solid way made his heart swoon. He just wished he was able to bring himself to ‘ask’ for his name sooner, but surely the older man was freaked out by Gio’s eagerness, so the added knowledge of Giovanni being his ‘number one fan’ would have been far too much.

Gio waited far too long for a taxi to finally stop for his waving arm, but he didn’t mind. The scene of talking to Miz Cracker played in his mind on a constant loop. _I have to tell Jordan, he would freak_. He slid into the back seat of the taxi, told the driver his address and settled into his seat.

It was a cool night, but the memory of having Miz Cracker’s back pressed up against his chest made Giovanni warm all over. He still couldn’t get over the look of surprise and even joy, that took over Miz Cracker’s face when he slid into the seat next to him.

Giovanni felt giddy. He pulled out his phone and opened Instagram. He searched Miz Cracker’s account before scrolling through her photos, a warmth emanating throughout his entire being.

* * *

_@yuhuahamasaki liked your post._

_@thatonequeen liked your post._

_@miaouler liked your post._

_@monetxchange liked your post._

_@missjuicyliu liked your post._

_@ageofaquaria liked your post._

Max stopped his scrolling, just as his heart stopped beating. He breathed heavily. Once. Twice. Before putting his phone down on his bedside table.

 _Breathe Max, just breathe. So what Giovanni liked your photo, it’s not as if he asked you on a date or proposed marriage_. Max’s insides churned as he tried to calm down, he screwed his eyes shut and breathed through his nose.

Max couldn’t get of Aquaria out of his head. It had been a week since their encounter at the bar and it hasn’t left his mind since. When he was at the gym, or when he was hanging out with Bob and Monet, even in the shower (he tried especially hard not to think about her in those more intimate moments), she was always there. What the hell was he going to do? He couldn’t focus on his own drag persona when the baby queen was constantly invading his thoughts.

Max laid in bed, blinking his eyes open until he was staring at the dilapidated ceiling in his shit-hole of an apartment. It was all he could afford at the moment, and even then, he was barely able to make ends meet. _I wonder what Aquaria’s apartment looks like…_ No. _Stop._ Max shook his head before turning it to the side and burying it into his pillow, he let out a drawn-out groan. He was never going to get Aquaria out of his head.

His phone beeped on his bedside table, Monet’s name flashing across the screen. He groaned again. It was too early to be dealing with her shit. He picked up the phone and accepted the call, and before he could even put it to his ear, Monet was screaming down the line.

“Bitch! You’re still in bed, aren’t you?! Get up, get out, enjoy the day!” Her loud voice boomed. Max winced.

“Indoors voice Monet, please,” Max sighed. “It’s only eleven, I got home at six this morning, because I had to make sure your drunk ass got home safely.”

“And look at me now, I’m up and out and about.” Max pictured Monet twirling down some busy street, with her arms wide open, surely hitting other pedestrians and pissing them off. The image brought a smile to his face.

“Of course, you’re already ‘out and about’, where are you going?” Max rolled out of bed and sat up, stretching his left arm above his head and popping his back muscles. He squinted against the rays of sunlight crawling through the slats in the half-broken blinds.

“I’m about a two-minute walk away from your place actually,” Monet’s happy voice chirped down the line. Max’s head dropped back, and he let out a deep breath through his nose.

“What’s that face about?” Monet teased.

“What face? You can’t even see me,” Max whined, walking into his bathroom and bracing his left hand on the sink, his right still holding the phone to his ear.

“You make this face when you’re annoyed or caught off-guard. Your eyes scrunch up and your nose crinkles,” Monet laughed. “It’s kinda cute.”

Max let out a belting laugh. “Cute? Cute my ass.”

“Hey, I know you probably think I’m only saying this because we’ve slept together, but it’s true.” Monet defended, her voice still as playful as ever. Max turned on the faucet and picked up his tooth brush, trying to balance his phone between his cheek and shoulder. “Plus, I’m sure Miss Aquaria would find it endearing…”

Max dropped his toothbrush and fumbled for his phone before it fell into the running water. “What?” He choked out, “Did you say Aquaria?”

Max hadn’t told Monet anything about Aquaria. She was his ‘crush’, if you could even call it that. Sure, it wasn’t if he was trying to hide it, but the only person that had picked up on it was Bob-

 _Bob_.

“Yeah! I said she’d think your face is cute. Or maybe she already does from what I heard,” Monet let out a loud laugh, Max could see her in his mind, holding her belly as she laughed like she was Santa or some shit.

“Bob told you, didn’t he?” Max sighed, dragging a hand down his tired face.

“Yep! And he was very happy to supply me with all the details! So, if you could-” Max stopped paying attention to Monet as he stared himself down in the mirror.

 _Could Aquaria ever find him attractive?_ Surely not. _Could Giovanni find him ‘cute’?_ Absolutely not.

Max’s eyes scanned his face. He was _okay_ looking. He hated his nose, it was too big. And his mouth was too small. And his teeth were too crooked. His eyes were a muddy brown colour. And his eyebrows were too thick. But overall, when those features were combined, it created one really average-looking person. And he was _okay_ with that.

This ‘average-looking’ person had had his fair share of trade walk in and out of his apartment, each one as satisfied as the last. Max thanked his toned and slender body for that, years and years of intense karate training had sculpted him into a fit and desirable form. Although, Max was only 5’5” and often described as ‘adorable’ or ‘juvenile-looking’, he could charm the skin off a snake if he really wanted to.

He was a solid six out of ten. Okay, four out of ten. Okay, five. He was a solid five, no higher no lower.

Maybe he did have a chance with Giovanni. Sure, the boy was drop dead gorgeous, and he was better than Max in every which way, but-

“Cracker? Cracker. Max. Maxy… Yoohoo. Maxwell.” Max shook his head and cleared his thoughts, his attention now on the clearly frustrated person on the other end of the phone line.

“What?”

“Were you listening to anything I just said?” Max racked is brain, searching for just one thing Monet mentioned in the last minute or so. Nothing. Monet exhaled deeply. “Really? I’ve been ringing the buzzer to your apartment for the last… I don’t know, decade? Let me up already, bitch.”

“Oh sorry,” Max scurried out of the bathroom, and pressed the buzzer to allow Monet into the apartment. He threw on some clothes that needed to be washed, badly, before spraying deodorant all over himself and chucking a piece of gum in his mouth to cover his morning breath.

A banging shook the door to the apartment, and Max took a second to collect himself. Bob knowing was not a big deal, he would keep to himself, most of the time, and limit how much he would say. He knew Max’s boundaries, and when they need and didn’t need pushing. Monet was a different story all together, one word of gossip and half of New York knew about it by sun down. She couldn’t keep her mouth shut. _But maybe this time it would be different._ Max hoped, but he knew it wasn’t going to happen.

Monet burst through the door as soon as Max unlocked it, making his way straight to the dining table. She turned and smiled at Max, with a mischievous glint to her eyes and a grin that could rival the Cheshire cat.

“I brought coffee and doughnuts,” Monet trilled, gesturing to the tray and paper bag she had set on the table. Max busied himself getting out plates and reheating the doughnuts, while Monet just continued to stare. That stupid grin still on her face.

“What,” Max sighed, sick of the silent interrogation.

“Oh nothing,” Monet said. “I’m just waiting for you to pour your delicate little heart out about Aquaria.”

Max rubbed at his eyes, he could feel a headache coming on. He plopped down into the seat across from Monet and sipped at his coffee. He placed his phone on the table facing up.

“What would you like to know?” Max sighed, bracing himself for the onslaught of questions.

“Tell me everything!” Monet squealed, kicking her legs underneath her and bouncing in her seat like a five-year-old.

Max opened his mouth to start talking. He glanced down at his phone as a notification lit his screen.

_@ageofaquaria just posted a photo._

Max smiled.

 

* * *

 

 

 

"Oh my god,” Jordan groaned. “Please stop checking your phone for five minutes, you literally only just posted the picture.”

 

Giovanni sighed and placed his phone down on the table. “Sorry,” he mumbled before digging back into his food.

 

“I don’t get why you don’t just ask him out, I mean clearly he’s into you. Didn’t you say he was like ‘practically obsessed with you’ or something?” Jordan continued, taking a bite of the kale salad on his fork and chewing loudly.

 

“I can’t just ‘ask him out’, he’s so much more older and  mature than me, and I don’t think he knows I’m only nineteen,” Giovanni answered, his face twisted in an unpleased manner.

 

It was something he was self-conscious about, how could anyone take him seriously when he was so young? Especially Miz Cracker, who had so much experience already. He’d probably think that Giovanni was too young, not polished enough.

 

 “So what? He could be your sugar daddy,” Jordan laughed, shovelling another mouth full of rabbit food into his mouth.

 

Giovanni chuckled, his shoulders shaking. He looked out the window of the small café him and Jordan were brunching at. He wondered what Miz Cracker was doing at that very moment. _Was he in bed? Sleeping? In the shower? Out and about? Sewing? Fucking someone else?_ The last thought left a sour taste in Gio’s mouth, he didn’t even want to think about the possibility of that.

 

 _I wonder if he’s thinking of me... That's impossible._ Gio sighed before looking down at his phone, a notification catching his eye.

 

_@miz_cracker liked your post._

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I hoped you liked it! It was kind of a boring chapter, I'm sorry. Please comment and kudos, and all that lovely stuff xx


	3. Nineteen

It had been a month. A month since Max had seen Giovanni. Well technically three weeks and five days, but who was counting? Max was, that’s who. It wasn’t as if he was stalking Giovanni’s Instagram every hour just waiting for at least one update on his life… Max knew that this little ‘crush’ was going a little bit too far, but he couldn’t help it.

It was a Wednesday night and Max and Monet had been put on ‘curb duty’, trying to lure as many pedestrians into the bar as possible to come and see their show. So far, they had not been very successful, week nights were always slow. Max was sweating his ass off, but he desperately needed the money.

“Hey babies,” Monet cooed at a group of twinks, fluttering her false lashes. “Wanna come see a whole lotta’ women shake their padded asses?”

The boys tittered and laughed, obviously drunk, before tripping over themselves to get into the club. Max smiled, if it was a slow night, they could always rely on twinks and white girls to spend money at their shows. Max twirled on the side walk, Miz Cracker was out in full force tonight. She looked stunning.

“Hey handsome, I need to pay my light bill, dammit! Come and spend money at my show,” Cracker directed to a man in a suit, who looked at her with a thin veil of disgust before hurrying away. She shrugged, you can’t get them all.

Cracker jumped when she felt a delicate tap on her shoulder. “Excuse me,” a light voice said. “Do you know where Bob the Drag Queen is performing tonight?”

Cracker rolled her eyes, Bob was easily one of the most sought-after queens in New York, people just seemed to eat him up. She turned around to see a girl that would be shorter than Cracker if she was not wearing heels, she was cute with rosy cheeks and a wide smile. Cracker could see from the corner of her eye that Monet had heard the question and was on her way over.

“Oh, are we not good enough?” Cracker teased, standing arms akimbo, a false sense of indignance lining her voice. The girl before her shrugged, an embarrassed heat blossoming over her already rosy cheeks.

“Is this little girl asking about Bob?” Monet shouted. “Girl, I can’t. All I hear these days is ‘Bob, Bob, Bob’. No wonder that bitch has a big head.”

The girl laughed, her shoulders shaking. “I’m guessing you lovely ladies know ‘Bob’ personally?”

Monet snorted. “If having Bob’s dick up both of our asses more than once means that we ‘know him personally’, then I guess we do.”

The girls mouth dropped open and she let out a loud belly laugh. Cracker just rolled her eyes and shook her head, Monet always got too personal too quickly, she couldn’t help but run her loud mouth. “I think I want to watch your show instead,” The girl said, laughter still in her voice.

Cracker smiled, she liked this girl. “It’s your lucky day sweetheart, Bob is performing after us.”

“Oh really! That’s awesome! I can’t wait to watch you ladies,” The girl gushed, her hands flew around in her excitement.

“We’ll see you in there, sweet cheeks,” Cracker said, cocking her hip to the side and flipping her long blonde wig.

The girl went to rush into the bar, but she stopped before she could get any further and turned around. “I’m Katelyn by the way!” Katelyn then disappeared into the bar, probably on her way to find a spot in the front row.

“She was adorable,” Monet said.

“She really was,” Cracker replied. They both smiled at each other before returning back to their chore, they needed as many customers as they could get.

* * *

“Gio, you have to come with me! They were so nice! Maybe they could get you a gig at their bar!” Katelyn gushed, grabbing Gio’s arm and jumping like an excited kid as they walked down the busy street.

“I don’t know Katelyn,” Gio said. “Queens from smaller bars are pretty territorial.”

“But they were so nice, and funny too! Their set had me crying I was laughing so hard.”

Gio loved Katelyn, she was one of the nicest people he had met in New York, but damn could she be persistent. Gio was only just getting comfortable performing at his regular club, the girls were finally taking him seriously and not seeing him as ‘some random kid’. He also was managing to pull a decent crowd when his name was advertised, which boosted his confidence to no end. However, each night Gio scanned the crowd in search of a particular face, but every time he was left disappointed. Gio was confident he would see Cracker again soon though, even though it had almost been a month.

“I don’t know Katelyn,” Gio sighed.

“At least come with me to see one of their shows,” Katelyn asked, her voice hopeful and light. “There’s one this Friday at eleven-thirty.”

Giovanni sighed again and tilted his head back, he couldn’t say ‘no’ to Katelyn, no one could. “Fine, I’ll come.”

Katelyn squealed, “We’re going to have so much fun! You’ll love them, they were hilarious-”

Giovanni pulled out his phone and opened Instagram. Cracker hadn’t posted in about a week. The last picture she put up was her and a queen called ‘Monet X Change’, Gio tried to not let the jealousy over come him. They’re just friends. He thinks. Cracker hadn’t posted anything too romantic looking or sounding about the queen, but there sure was a lot of photos of the queen on her feed. _If you call wearing a pussy-cat wig and a body suit 'being a drag queen'._ Gio shook his head, now was not the time to get jealous over a fictional romance that his mind had fabricated.

Gio sighed again, looking down at his phone. He refreshed the app.

* * *

He was here.

Giovanni was at the club that Max- _Miz Cracker_ was performing at. Max had seen him in the crowd when he had quickly ducked to the bar to grab a drink before he started to get ready. He was sitting with that girl Katelyn that he had met outside the bar earlier in the week. The sight had almost caused him to faint, it had been almost a month since their last interaction after all. However, Monet and Bob almost always found a way to work Aquaria into conversation (Max didn’t tell them that he referred to Giovanni with his real name, that was something he chose to keep to himself).

Max stared at the reflection in front of him, Miz Cracker stared back. He looked good. She looked good, she always did. Max kept eye contact with his reflection as he secured his clip-on earrings, taking his time to trail his eyes over Miz Crackers features. He never felt more confident than when he was Miz, she was his ice-breaker, and she never failed to turn out. Max just hoped that Giovanni liked her. Sure, he knew that Gio had seen her on Instagram, but he doesn’t know if he had seen Miz in action.

“You okay girl?” Monet asked, taking a seat at next to Max before reapplying her lipstick.

“Just dandy,” Max replied.

“You sure? You seem nervous,” Monet said, a slight bit of worry etched into her tone.

“Really, I’m fine, just a little tired I guess,” Max smiled, it was strained. He didn’t want Monet to know that Gio was there, and how much that fact really affected him. He knocked back a shot that was sitting on the counter. “Let’s do this.”

Max stretched side stage, hidden by the curtains. Max tried his hardest to channel Miz Cracker, she would turn this out, she would impress Giovanni. Max looked to the crowd to try and distract himself. The place was packed, patrons filled almost every seat and the bar was churning out drinks like no tomorrow. Monet and Cracker always pulled in a big crowd. Max usually thrived off it. But not tonight.

A local queen introduced Miz Cracker onto the stage. Max took a breath. The lights blinded him as he stepped up and grabbed the microphone. Cheers and whistles from the audience drowned his ears, he perked up a little.

“Good evening, New York! My name is Brianna Cracker, but you can call me Miz Cracker, because I’m thin, I’m h-white, and I’m salty.” The crowed laughed. It was show time bitches.

Cracker tore the place to shreds, she had every single person in the crowd in stitches laughing, and when it was time for her lip sync, she made a killing in tips. Cracker was happy that the stage lights drowned out most of her vision, because she couldn’t see Giovanni, though her eyes were drawn to where she knew he would be sitting.

During her break, Cracker slowly made her way to the bar, being stopped every couple steps to take a picture or talk with an enthusiastic audience member. When she finally got there she practically slumped onto the counter and ordered a shot. Cracker made a silent toast to herself, she was fucking proud for doing her best and managing not to choke knowing Giovanni was in the crowd. She knocked back her shot and slammed it on the counter, her face scrunching up as the bitter liquid ran down her throat.

A familiar tap on her shoulder caught her attention. She turned to see Katelyn with an ecstatic grin on her face, and a few steps behind her… Giovanni. _Fuck_.  Cracker’s smile faltered as a nervous buzzing consumed her entire being. _God, he looks good_.

“You were amazing! Even better than the other day if that even possible!” Katelyn said, grin still adorning her features. Her happiness was contagious, and Cracker couldn’t help but match her smile.

“Thank you so much for coming! I’m glad you enjoyed the show,” Cracker said, her voice coming out surprisingly smooth and collected. _Yes, another win for Cracker_.

“It’s no problem! Oh! This is my friend Giovanni, he’s a drag queen too,” Katelyn gestured to the boy behind her. Cracker locked eyes with Gio, and a familiar warmth filled his veins.

“Hi Gio, or should I say Aquaria?” Cracker said, a coy smile adorning her face as she curled her fingers in a small wave.

“Hey Crackerttack,” Giovanni smiled, his eyes sparkling. The two kept their eyes locked, lost in a moment of silent reconnection. Katelyn looked between the two of them confused.

“You already know each other? Gio, why didn’t you tell me?” Katelyn asked baffled. Gio just shrugged in response, breaking their silent staring contest. “Well Miz Cracker-”

“Max-” Cracker could feel Giovanni’s eyes on him as he interrupted Katelyn. “You can call me Max, that’s my ‘boy name’.”

Cracker looked up in time to see Giovanni whisper the name underneath his breath, as if he was practicing, as if it was the first time he had ever heard the name. A flutter blossomed inside him, thinking about Giovanni whispering his name in his ear. When they’re alone, in the dark, at his apartment. _Not now Cracker, good god girl, get a grip_.

“Anyways, _Max_ ,” Katelyn smiled. “Do you want to get a drink with Gio and I?”

“Yeah sure, why not,” Cracker said, her eyes subconsciously following Gio’s every move. They headed to the bar, Cracker squished between the two of them. Thankfully they didn’t have to wait too long for a bar tender to notice them, another great asset to being Cracker: she was never not noticed.

Cracker and Katelyn ordered, chatting as their drinks were made. Gio was carded almost as soon as he started ordering, he rolled his eyes and pulled out his ID, waving it in front of the bar tenders face. Katelyn looked like she was about to burst, and as soon as the bartender handed Gio his drink and walked away, she did.

“Oh my god Gio!” She laughed. “I still can’t believe that they think that dingey old thing is real!”

Gio flushed, his cheeks turning a bright red, no amount of bad club lighting could hide it. Cracker cocked her head confused. _What?_

“What do you mean?” Cracker asked, looking between an embarrassed Gio and a laughing Katelyn.

“His ID, it’s fake. Giovanni is only nineteen, practically fresh out of the womb,” Katelyn teased, poking Gio in the arm, to which he shrugged away.

Cracker felt her stomach bottom out. Her face dropped. And all the blood drained from her face, making her feel light-headed. “Nineteen?” She squeaked.

“Yeah,” Katelyn replied. “He’s only a baby.”

Cracker gulped, all the confidence and finesse that Cracker had managed to build up during the night was gone, and she was just Max again. Anxious, confused Max.

He had been lusting over a literal teenager. A teenager eleven years younger than him. A child. _Oh my god_. Max smiled a strained smile, his eyes not able to focus on one particular spot. He couldn’t even look at Giovanni, he was too ashamed of himself. _It's official, I’m a creep_.

“I-I’ve got to go an-and prepare for my next set,” Max mumbled, before stumbling away from the bar and towards the dressing room, throwing a quick ‘bye’ over his shoulder.

Giovanni stood there emotionless, watching Max walk away. He had sensed the change in Max as soon as the words had left Katelyn’s mouth. He didn’t know what to say or do, the damage had been done. Katelyn was oblivious to the destruction she had just caused, happily sipping on her Pina Colada. Giovanni wanted to smack it out of her hands.

“I like her,” She said, looking at Gio with a happy face. Giovanni didn’t respond. He placed his drink on the counter behind him, still staring at the spot that Max was once standing in.

Giovanni was going to be sick.

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I know it took me a long time to update, and I don't really have an excuse... but I hope you enjoyed the chapter! Also please leave a comment, they feed me and give me motivation to actually write!!


	4. New

This feeling was worse than a hangover. Worse than having a good book spoiled. Worse than tripping over in front a crowd full of people. Worse than having your wig fall off mid performance. Max groaned and lightly banged is head on the table in front of him, making it shake and causing other patrons of the small coffee shop to look at him in concern. _What the fuck was he going to do?_

He couldn’t just _forget_ about Giovanni. The boy was practically burned into Max’s mind. But Gio was just that: a boy, a _child_. A whole eleven years difference. Max tried to justify it in his mind, but he just _couldn’t_. Giovanni couldn’t possibly want to be pursued by a thirty-year-old man, he probably had men around his own age begging to date him.

Max looked out the window of the small café, nestling his head into the crook of his elbows that were resting on the table. The sky was dark and gloomy. Perfect. It suited Max’s wallowing mood impeccably. He was waiting for Bob, and though it had only been about fifteen minutes since he arrived, it felt like he had been there forever.

A bell jingled somewhere in the background, and heavy-set foot steps approached Max’s table. A large figure slumped into the chair across from Max’s, he didn’t have to turn his head to know that it was Bob. Max nestled his head into his arms further.

“Morning, Cracks,” Bob hummed, picking up a menu and skimming the options. “How have you been?”

Max snorted. “How do you think I’ve been?” His words were muffled by his arms. Bob rolled his eyes before placing the menu back on the able. He rested his elbows on the table and laced his fingers together, before placing his chin on top.

“Cracker. Cracker, look at me.” Max turned his head so that he was at least facing Bob, he wasn’t in the mood to try and hold eye-contact today. “It’s not as if you were dating or anything, it was a crush. So what he’s only nineteen? Who cares, now you know that he’s somewhat off-limits and you move on your merry way. The end.”

“It’s not as easy as it sounds,” Max responded, his voice sad. Bob rolled his eyes, shaking his head at Max.

Bob was sick of Max’s self-wallowing, it had been going on for _days_. But he knew that he had to be careful with what he said to Max, even though he was a resilient person, wording just one thing wrong could cause Max to go into a downward spiral of overthinking and self-loathing. Max didn’t need that, he already had too much to deal with.

“Yes, it is,” Bob sighed. “Just be friends with the kid, I’m sure he needs a little influence when it comes to drag. I know he has Sharon and she’s a great ‘drag-mom’, but she’s always touring, so maybe it’d be good for you to step up and be another mentor for him.”

Max’s mind froze. He sat up straight in his chair. It didn’t even enter his head that he could _just be friends_ with Giovanni. _You can be so stupid sometimes Max_. It could work, there would be no pressure for Max to pursue anything. And Max understands Giovanni, he too needed a little bit of extra guidance when he was first starting his drag career. This would be good for Max, of course it would benefit Giovanni too, but it could also help Max improve his networking skills. Maybe Giovanni could each him a few things.

“That’s actually… not a bad idea,” Max said under his breath, his eyes not focusing on anything in particular as he fully processed Bob’s words.

“What can I say? I’m a genius,” Bob said. “Can we order now or what bitch?”

* * *

Gio looked at his phone screen and rolled his eyes before tossing it on the couch beside him. He hadn’t made an effort to talk to Katelyn since the incident at the bar the other week. She’s confused as to why he won’t answer her messages, and he doesn’t blame her, he would be confused too if he were her. But she just had to open her mouth and blurt out his age.

Gio had formulated a plan on how to tell Max his age. He was going to prove how mature and collected he could be, show Max that he wasn’t a complete idiot, and then casually mention his age - which would have been brushed off because Max would be so enamoured with him already. But nope. It didn’t happen.

But Gio was so young, why would Cracker want to date somebody so juvenile? He literally had nothing to offer, maybe his looks, but that was besides the point. Max had experienced so much of the world already, he had done so much, he knew so much. All Gio had done so far was graduate high school, move to New York, and drop out of college to become a drag queen. Max would probably want someone more around his own age, someone cultured and intelligent. Someone not like Giovanni.

He groaned. _Why did everything have to be so complicated?_

He needed a distraction. Gio stood up and stretched his arms above his head, popping out his spine. He looked down at his coffee table and groaned. He had been on his phone as a distraction from the bills that were slowly accumulating on his small coffee table. Money was definitely tight at the moment. He had already cost his parents so much money, he couldn’t possibly ask for more, he would feel way too guilty.

Giovanni really needed to start looking into other bars and clubs that might be willing to hire him. Maybe Katelyn was right, maybe Gio should ask Max or _Cracker_ about possibly getting a gig at her usual bar or club. It wouldn’t hurt to try.

He grabbed his phone again and opened Instagram, going directly to Cracker’s page. It was literally muscle memory at this point. He scrolled through her pictures, until he found one with the venue tagged. It was the place that Cracker performed at last week. He wrote down the contact information of the venue that they displayed in their bio, huffing a deep breath before opening his laptop.

He was really doing this. He was going to work at the same club as Cracker. Well that’s if they allow him too.  He punched their email in before composing a short but sweet message, expressing his interest in working in the club, and specifically leaving out his age. It had already gotten him in enough strife in the last few days.

Gio hit send.  He sat back on the couch, breathing in deeply. Anxious was too tame of a term to describe what he was feeling right now. He would have to make all new friends with the girls, assert his worth to have a spot at the club, it would be like starting all over again. Why did he do this? He probably just should have stuck with his own club. It would probably take the place ages to get back to him anyways, hell, they may never even get back to him-

Gio’s laptop pinged. A new email lit up his inbox. He scrambled to open it. It was the venue. _Fuck they work fast_. His eyes skimmed the words, picking up on the most important bits.

“ _Hi Aquaria_.” Skip. “ _Thank you for your email_.” Skip. “ _We are big fans of your work_.” Skip. “ _We would love to have you._ ” Bingo. Gio jumped up and squealed, dancing around his small apartment and punching his fists into the air.

 _Yes. Yes, yes, yes, yes_. YES.

He would get more time with Max _and_ he would get more money. It was a win/win situation. He had to tell Jordan.

* * *

 _Just friends. Just friends. Just friends_.

Max couldn’t stop thinking of Bob’s words from earlier in the week. The bitch was right. Him and Giovanni could just be friends. Not that he had had a chance since their last interaction to _just be his friend_. But he had to prepare himself for the next time he randomly bumped into Giovanni.

He secured his lash and straightened out his wig. It was Cracker transformation time baby, and she looked fierce tonight. Monet was set up next to cracker, lip syncing to herself in the mirror with her head phones in. Bob was sitting on the couch in full face but in boy clothes, his long body taking up all the space. A few other local queens were scattered around the room, all in their own world.

Max loved his job. He never knew he could love something more than he loved this place and these people. It was his home. He smiled to himself as he put the last finishing touches on his make-up, making sure that Miz Cracker looked one hundred percent perfect, like she always did.

“Okay hun, last but not least, this is the dressing room where all the girls get ready,” The club manager’s voice filled the room as the door open, revealing him and a shy Giovanni. He was in full drag, and he looked absolutely stunning. “Girls meet Aquaria, Aquaria meet the girls, I’m sure they’ll all introduce themselves. Aquaria is going to be performing with us a few nights a week, I want you all to make her feel welcome, okay?”

Replies of affirmation filled the room, as the queens all sized Aquaria up. Most of them obviously didn’t see her as threatening as they turned back to their previous tasks. The others still watched her with a wary eye.

“Why don’t you go set up next to Juicy Liu? Actually, go sit next to Miz Cracker, she’s probably the nicest one out of all these whores,” The manager laughed, gesturing towards where Cracker sat at her vanity. _Oh God_.

Aquaria slowly made her way over, make up box and costume bag in tow. Cracker’s heart began to race, _what was she doing here?_ Cracker hadn’t yet fully prepared herself to see Gio again, but this time it seemed to be even worse, because Gio was Aquaria, and Aquaria was hypnotising. _This is going to be one major cluster fuck_.

Aquaria smiled tentatively at Cracker, the nerves and anxiety painted all across her face. “Can I sit here?” Aquaria asked even though the manager already said she could, she didn’t want to over step any boundaries. She literally couldn’t take her eyes off of Cracker. _She was so beautiful_. Aquaria felt like her insides were going to combust at any moment. _This was a bad idea_.

“Of course you can!” Cracker practically yelled, pushing half her make up aside to make room for Aquaria’s stuff.

“Thanks,” She mumbled. Aquaria sat lightly in the seat, keeping her eyes locked on Cracker. Aquaria couldn’t help but stare, Cracker looked absolutely flawless. _Calm the fuck down Aquaria, she doesn’t need to know that you’re a freak_.

“I didn’t know you were getting a job here,” Cracker said enthusiastically, trying to disguise her somewhat obvious confusion and surprise. She tried to make herself look casual by holding earrings up as if she were seeing which ones matched her outfit better, even though she knew which ones she was going to wear. Aquaria tracked her every movement.

“Yeah, I found out only this week,” Aquaria replied. “It all happened so fast.”

“That’s awesome!” Cracker said. “It’s a really awesome club, you’re gonna love it.”

“Are you not going to introduce me?” Monet suddenly chimed in. An instant smile broke out over Cracker’s face, causing Aquaria’s gut to twist. Aquaria willed herself not to hate Monet straightaway, she hadn’t even met the queen yet for goodness sake. She just needed to remember that every preconceived idea that Aquaria had thought about Cracker and Monet was wrong… or yet to be proven.

“Aquaria, this is Monet. Monet, this is Aquaria,” Cracker said, gesturing between the two. Aquaria met Monet’s eyes, trying to give a sincere as possible smile. It was hard.

“Nice to meet you girl, this hoe doesn’t shut up about you. It really gets on my fuckin’ nerves,” Monet said, laughing as Cracker punched her in the arm. Aquaria smiled big, her teeth on full display. _Cracker talks about me to her friends_.

“Oh my god, no I don’t,” Cracker said, exasperated. “I’m sorry, she has a big fuckin mouth.”

“It’s okay, Katelyn and I haven’t shut up about you guys’ performance the other week, that was on another level,” Aquaria excitedly admitted, almost bouncing in the chair. She needed Cracker to know that the feelings were mutual.

“You were there?! I’m so glad you liked it! We killed it that night, I can easily say that was one of our best performances yet,” Monet said, puling in cracker for a side hug. Aquaria’s gut twist again.

“It was amazing,” Aquaria said, her smile a little less bright as Monet’s arm still held its place around Cracker’s shoulders.

Cracker cocked her head to the side, watching as the joy slowly drained from Aquaria’s face, causing her to slump slightly in the chair. That was odd?

Aquaria sat quietly for a while as the other queens got ready around her. She really needed to get out of her own head. Cracker did even know that she had a thing for her, so Aquaria really needed to get over herself.  She pulled out her ‘touch up pouch’ and started to poke and prod at her already perfect make up, doing anything to distract herself.

Cracker watched Aquaria silently, the young queen was obviously fighting a losing battle in her own head, which was something that Cracker was very familiar with. The poor thing was going to work herself into a state, or even give herself an anxiety attack. Cracker needed to bring her out of it.

“So, do you know what time you’re going on tonight?” Cracker said, trying to bring Aquaria back into the conversation. “Aqua?”

Aquaria jumped out of her stupor, surprised at the nickname that Cracker had dubbed her. She had never been called ‘Aqua’ before. She loved it. “Yeah?”

“I asked what time are you on stage tonight?” Cracker said with a warm smile.

“I think I’m after Juicy? I’m not sure,” Aquaria mumbled, her cheeks flushing.

“Oh! You’re on before me!” Monet chimed, “You’re gon’ show me up.”

Aquaria laughed awkwardly. “No, I’m not, you’re a great performer.”

“Aqua, please you will show her up,” Cracker said, finally securing a pair of earrings in place. “Pretty much everyone shows Monet up.”

“Bitch! The shade of it all!” Monet crowed. She turned back to Aquaria, “We’ll go to the stage together, ‘kay doll?”

Aquaria nodded, trying her hardest not to show her silent resentment towards the queen.

* * *

“Okay we’re up,” Monet said, gesturing for Aquaria to follow her.

“Good luck!” Cracker called to them as they walked out of the dressing room. Aquaria could hardly breathe, she was sure she was going to faint.

Monet led Aquaria to the side of the stage, where they were partially hidden by a curtain but was still able to watch the queen onstage carry out her set. Aquaria stood silently, partly because she had no idea what to say and because she was a ball of nerves.

What if she tripped on stage? What if her wig falls off? Or her heel breaks? What if she forgets the lyrics to the song that she chose? What if she accidentally kicks an audience member in the face? What if-

“Okay kid,” Monet said breaking Aquaria out of her inner turmoil. “I need you to listen to me, okay?”

Aquaria nodded, sceptical. “Okay…?”

“Cracker likes you,” Monet said. The world seemed to stop. Aquaria’s heart almost fell out of her ass, and her mouth dropped open. This was everything she wanted to hear, but she didn’t believe it for a second.

“What?!” She almost screeched, causing Monet to ‘shhh’ her.

“Hush girl. I said Cracker likes you, and you may not like her, but you need to be careful, please,” Monet said, looking around to see if anyone was watching.

“And she told you this?” Aquaria asked, baffled.

“No,” Monet shook her head.

“Well-”

“No, listen to me,” Monet interrupted. “I know Cracker- _Max_. I know Max. He hasn’t acted this love sick over a guy in years, and you need to be careful. I saw you watching him in the dressing room, so I know that you like him too. But you need to remember that there is an eleven-year age difference between you two, okay? So, don’t go breakin’ his heart, and I’ll make sure he doesn’t break yours.”

All Aquaria could do was nod, she was at a loss for words. _Max liked her?_ A goofy smile took over Aquaria’s face, which caused Monet to roll her eyes.

“You’re up next girl,” Monet said, pointing at the stage as Juicy finished her set.

Aquaria stepped up, all her nerves seemed to have faded away. They were insignificant compared to the information that she just found out. Because Max liked Giovanni, and that was all that mattered right now.

Aquaria’s name was announced by the MC. She took a deep breath and stepped onto the stage.

Maybe Monet wasn’t that bad after all?

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I made a Tumblr! You can find me @/ aquariusmattel :)   
> I'm not sure how I feel about this chapter, it's kinda just 'Meh' to me. But please tell me what you think, feedback helps me to write better!!


	5. Almost

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I'm sorry this took so long to get out, but I went through the worst period of writer's block. I hope you all enjoy it and please ignore any mistakes, as I don't always pick them up x

Gio’s fingers hovered over the key board on the small screen, trying to think of just one thing he could write. He typed something, and then deleted it. He typed a few letters and backspaced. He found a meme that was kind of funny but didn’t know if Max would appreciate it or even get it. He sighed and closed his phone, placing it next to him on the bed.

Gio stared at the ceiling, bored out of his brain. It was his day off. He had been working at Max’s club for just over a month, and everything was going great. Well almost everything. Gio couldn’t seem to get Max into seeing him as anything other than a friend or a friendly co-worker even. It was driving him crazy, usually he could have anyone he wanted, not that he had that many romantic partners in his short life-time.

Gio let the waves of wallowing self-pity crash over him in a tide of despair. He couldn’t help but feel sorry for himself. He had been pulling all his best moves, and nothing was yet to come of their “friendship”, if you could even call it that. What was a boy to do to just get one ounce of _attention_ -

His phone buzzed beside him and he scrambled to pick it up. Max’s name flashed across the screen. Gio’s heart skipped a beat. That was another thing he had to get used to – older people liked to call, not text, which didn’t coincide well with Gio’s introverted nature. But damn, if it meant he got to hear Max’s voice more often, he could learn to live with it.

“Cracks!” Gio breathed as soon as he picked up the phone, obvious excitement lacing his voice.

A chuckle that melted Gio’s insides sounded from the other end of the line. “Hey Aqua, how’s things?” Max said in his cute voice. Gio’s heart burst at the nickname that only Max used.

“Good!” God, he needed to tone it down. “Good, I-I’m good. How about you?”

Another chuckle. “I’m very good, thank you for asking. Look, Katelyn and I are going out for drink tonight after my set, do you maybe wanna join?”

Gio’s gut twisted. This was a new development that he had yet to wrap his head around. Katelyn and Max. They had practically become glued at the hip since they met, they almost spent every waking moment together. Gio would never admit that he was jealous, but he totally was. He was supposed to be the one that befriended Max and then spend all day with him or on the phone with him, and then after a while Max would realise he had feelings for Gio. He had the fantasy all figured out. But Gio was genuinely happy that Katelyn and Max had found each other, it’s hard to come by friendships like that.

“Ummm, sure, sounds great? I’ll see if I have anything on tonight and I’ll get back to you,” Gio said, scratching at his neck. He had to ask Jordan what his next course of action would be, he was the master at this stuff.

“Yeah! Sounds great, I’ll talk to you soon, yeah?” Max said, his voice chirpy.

“Okay. Bye,” Gio mumbled before hanging up his phone and rolling onto his front, shoving his face in his pillow. He felt like screaming.

Gio rolled back onto his side, grabbing his phone and pulling up his and Jordan’s messages. He began to type.

_“hey bitch, I need your worldly advice-”_

* * *

Max placed his phone carefully onto the counter, letting out a huge breath. _What the fuck was he doing?_ Why did he just invite Giovanni out? And why did he tell him that Katelyn was going to be there? He looked up at Monet, her eyes sparkling and a cheeky grin adorning her face.

That’s right. He said Katelyn was going to be there because he was too much of a coward to just ask him on a date. _Jesus Max, you need to ger your shit together, you’re a grown man for fucks sake_.

Monet cupped her cheeks and rested her elbows on the counter. “So… what’d he say?”

“He said he’d see if he has any other plans tonight and get back to me,” Max replied, bracing his hands on the counter. He didn’t even know what to think about that answer, was it a way for Gio to tell him ‘no’ without saying it outright?

“Well, it’s not a ‘no’, so that’s a good start,” Monet said, sipping her tea.

“Why did you make me do this?” Max groaned and pressed the heels of his palms into his eyes.

“Because, you’re turning into a hermit, and you like this guy, so why not?”

She had a point. Max had been more introverted than he usually is lately, and he did like Gio, more than he’d like to admit. Maybe this was a good thing, and tricking Gio into thinking that Katelyn would be there isn’t that bad, right?

Katelyn couldn’t even make it to the show, she had meetings all night at the school she worked at. So, she couldn’t save the day even if Max wanted her to. He sighed and slumped further into his chair. Max should have thought this through better.

Maybe he should invite Bob or Juicy to be there too. Just in case.

 “What are you doing?” Monet asked, suspicion lining her voice as she watched Max pick up his phone, doubt clouding his features.

“Just texting Juicy, seeing if she’s free tonight,” Max mumbled, thumbing through his contacts.

“Ohhh no. No. Nu-uh, honey. Nope. Not happening,” Monet said, snatching Max’s phone from his hand and holding it above and away from Max.

“Mon, please, don’t be stupid,” Max groaned, too lazy to even try to get his phone back. He reached an arm towards the phone but didn’t make any actual effort to grab it, stretching his fingers out in a ‘gimme’ motion.

“Me? Stupid? No girl, you’re the one being stupid here. You are not inviting Juicy to your date,” Monet replied, her voice stern but kind.

“But what if Gio says he doesn’t want to come, then I’ll have no one to even hang out with tonight then,” Max whined.

“Girl, really? ‘No one’? What am I to you then, chopped liver? I’ll be there,” Monet raised an eyebrow, mock offence pouring from her tone.

“You know I didn’t mean it like that,” Max said, a light sense of embarrassment overcoming him.

“Yeah, yeah, whatever,” Monet waved him off. “Do you want coffee?”

Max nodded, slumping in his seat. Moments later Monet handed a black cup of coffee, he hummed in thanks as he took a sip, before picking up his phone. He almost choked on the burning liquid as he saw his most recent notification.

A text from Giovanni.

“ _drinks sound amazing tonight, I can’t wait to see you ;) x_ ”

Fuck.

Max began to sweat heavily under is collar as his heart pounded in his chest. He read the short sentence about a dozen times, and each time he felt even more breathless.

It was going to be a long night.

* * *

It was especially busy, even though it was a Saturday night. Gio was crammed into the corner of the club, but he seemed to have a pretty decent view of the stage and easy access to the bar. He had arrived late, not really interested in anybody else’s performance but Cracker’s.

Gio checked his phone and replied to a couple messages. Some from his mum, some from his sister, and one from Jordan. His eyes flicked back to his conversation with Katelyn, he had sent her a text almost an hour ago asking what time she was getting to the club, but she had yet to reply. Gio huffed and slouched in his seat, taking another swig of his drink. He May have had one too many already tonight, but he just needed something to calm himself down.

_“Just play it cool and calm, and he’ll be sucking your dick in no time.”_

Jordan’s words from earlier in the day ran on a constant loop in his head. Jordan wasn’t the best at giving motivational talks, but he still got his point across, and that was all Gio needed. As long as he could keep his calm around Max and impress the shit out of him at the same time, then Gio would be fine. But if Monet was right, and Max really did like Gio, then Gio didn’t know what he was going to do. He hadn’t thought that far ahead, he just hoped that at that point Max would take the reigns or something. Gio wasn’t very experienced in relationships.

Gio got up and ordered another drink from the bar. He gulped down half the drink before he even got back to his spot, he knew he should be drinking water or something, but he just needed the alcohol right now. The sensation of the liquid burning as it slid down his throat distracted him from any nerves that fluttered in the it of his stomach. All Gio wanted right now was to see Max, just one glimpse of him would settle him completely.

The lights dimmed, and the stage MC announced Miz Cracker to the stage. A gentle warmth lit up Gio’s chest and a buzz ignited his veins. His stomach twisted as Miz Cracker stepped on stage. He was breathless just looking at her, she was so beautiful.

Gio sat entranced for the whole of Cracker’s set, his eyes never leaving the stage. He felt his phone buzz a few times in his pocket, but he ignored it, too scared to even miss one second of Cracker’s performance. Sure, he had seen her perform a hundred times now that they had started working together, but Cracker moved in a way that Gio couldn’t help but be absolutely captivated every single time.

When Cracker’s full set was over, Gio moved more towards the bar, hoping to see if he could catch a glimpse of Katelyn. Gio’s phone buzzed again in his pocket, he plucked it out to see two new messages from Katelyn. He sighed in relief as he tapped into their conversation.

Gio, sent 8:21pm: _“hey what time are you getting to Cracker’s show tonight?”_

Katelyn, sent 11:09pm: _“oh I can’t come, I’ve got a work thing, it’s running really late and doesn’t show any signs of ending soon. I thought Cracker would have told you I can’t come! I did tell her last week so maybe she forgot… have fun without me though and stay safe! Xx.”_

Katelyn, sent 11:20pm: “ _I think I’m about to die of boredom, someone come and save me, this is going forever!!_ ”

Katelyn, sent 11:32pm: _“Have a drink for me G, this meeting is draining the life out of me, lol”_

Gio stood dumbfounded in the middle of the busy walk way. Disgruntled bar patrons pushed passed him in obvious contempt, complaining about him blocking the path. But Gio could hear or feel them, his mind was a whirlwind of ‘why?’. His stare at his phone became penetrating, his eyes blurring at the intensity of his gaze. _This didn’t make any sense_.

Why would Max tell him Katelyn would be there if he knew she would be working? Was Max scared that Gio would say no? Maybe Max got the dates wrong, maybe he thought Katelyn’s meeting was next weekend. Did Max think he needed to trick Gio into coming to the club by saying that Katelyn would be there? Maybe Max _did_ like him.

Gio could have been standing there for hours, but he didn’t even realise, his mind was so hazy from the alcohol and focussed on Max that he couldn’t even function. A girl walking past threw him a concerned glance, walking up to him and leaning in close to be heard over the deafening noise of the club. “Hey, are you okay?” She said, placing a tentative hand on Gio’s arm. Gio’s eyes snapped to hers and he flushed, embarrassed. She smiled warmly.

“Yeah, s-sorry,” He stumbled, his words failing him. “Just a little out of it, I-I think I’ve had t-too much to drink.”

“Do you want me to get you some water?” The girl in front of him said, concern still lining her features. Just as Gio started to shake his head ‘no’, a figure walking to towards him caught his eye. Max.

“No, no. It’s okay,” Gio mumbled before stumbling to Max, but before he could even get anywhere he tripped over his own feet. The girl went to lunge for him, but he was caught by a strong pair of arms.

“Woah, hey Aqua,” Max laughed, his brown eyes twinkling. Gio looked at his gorgeous, de-dragged face in awe. He couldn’t make himself talk, even though his subconscious screamed at him to _just say something_. Max was standing right in front of him, perfect as always, and the storm that was raging inside of his head seemed to subdue. A sense of calm, almost like euphoria, burst from Gio’s gut and caused him to burrow deeper into Max’s hold.

“Do you know him?” The girl asked, moving closer to Gio as if to protect him. She looked at Max with suspicion, obviously trying to decide if Max was a stranger that was trying to take advantage of Gio or not.

“Yeah, he’s my f-friend,” Gio mumbled. Max smiled down at him, a rare feat considering that the top of Max’s head barely touches Gio’s chin when standing upright. Gio loved it, he could stare up at Max for a life time.

“Oh,” The girl said, glancing between Max and Gio, a small, knowing smile lighting her face. “Take care of him, okay?” She said looking at Max before grinning and walking away, throwing a wave over her shoulder.

“Hey,” Max said, smiling down at Gio, happiness radiating off of every fibre of his being.

“Hi,” Gio breathed back, unable to say or do much more than just stare.

“A little drunk are we Gio? Had a little too much to drink,” Max hummed. The vibrations from his chest thrummed throughout Gio’s body, Max’s voice was like a song that caused hairs to stand up on Gio’s arms and a purr to fill his ears. A drunk passer-by stumbled into the back of Max, causing them to stumble the slightest bit, and ultimately ruining their moment.

“Let’s go get you some water and find a booth, yeah?” Max said, running a hand through his sweaty hair. Gio could only nod.

Max quickly located a small booth crammed into a quieter corner of the bar, gesturing for Gio to slide into his seat before heading to the bar to grab some water. When he came back, he slid in next to Gio. Gio startled when he felt Max’s thigh press up against his, expecting Max to take the seat across from him, but this was far better.

Max made Gio drink the whole glass of water and then his own before he could even say anything. Gio’s heart burst at the thought that Max was actually taking care of him. _He is perfect boyfriend material, my mum would absolutely love it if I brought him home._

“You were amazing tonight,” Gio said, throwing a glance to his right to garner Max’s reaction. Max smiled wide and ducked his head a little.

“Thank you,” Max said, not looking at Gio. “I knew you’d be watching, so… I tried to, I don’t know, step it up a little.”

Gio smiled lazily at Max, his eyes becoming hooded as he stared at the man next to him. He leaned in closer and placed a hand on Max’s arm, speaking directly into his ear even though Max could hear him just fine. “You’re always amazing on stage, I can never take my eyes off of you,” Gio said, a breathiness overcoming his tone.

He could feel Max’s shudder under his hand and watched as Max screwed his eyes shut for just a second before looking back at Gio. He went to open his mouth and say something, but Gio beat him to it. “Why did you say Katelyn was coming? I know she’s at work,” He blurted, immediately regretting it as he saw Max’s face drop.

“I-I. Um, I don’t kn-know?” Max replied, turning his head away to hide his crimson stained cheeks. He scooted away from Gio a little, breaking what little contact they had to begin with. Gio missed it immediately.

Gio shifted in closer, trying to reconnect the connection that was lost. He tentatively placed his hand on the back of Max’s neck, and felt his whole body stiffen at the contact. This was uncharted territory for the both of them, they had never sat this close before, or touched this much, but they really fucking wanted to. Max turned his head back towards Gio, his eyes going dark.

“Max, if you just wanted to ask me on a date, all you had to do was… well, ask me,” Gio said, a small smile lighting his voice.

“I know,” Max murmured. “But I was scared you would say ‘no’.”

“I’ve been practically begging you to ask me out for ages, without actually saying it,” Gio admitted. Max’s eyes widened, as disbelief ran across his features.

“Really?” He breathed, too stunned to do anything more than just stare at Gio in wonder. Gio moved even closer and angled his body so that their chests were practically touching. The hand on the back of Max’s neck slid up into his hair, scratching lightly. Max let out a small groan. Gio smiled.

“Really, really,” Gio replied, inching his head forward and glancing between Max’s eyes and lips. Max sat with hooded eyes, watching as Gio got closer and closer, licking his lips before tilting his head forward too.

This was really about to happen. Gio was finally going to kiss Max, he had been wondering what his lips would feel like, what he would taste like-

Before their lips could even touch. Max’s phone buzzed in his pocket, breaking their trance. They stared at each other like deer caught in headlights for a few seconds before either of them moved. Gio shifted back a little bit, fake coughing to cover his awkwardness. Max fumbled for his phone, pulling it out and answering it was a flustered and frustrated “Hello?”

Gio watched as the frustration melted from Max’s form and he seemed to deflate. Max just stared at the adjacent wall as the person on the other side of the line chatted his ear off, he didn’t respond. By the end of the phone call Max was slouched in his seat, and he offered a small ‘thank you’ before hanging up.

Max didn’t move or say anything for a few moments, obviously lost in his own head. “Hey, are you okay?” Gio asked, his concern for Max growing as the older man didn’t move a muscle.

“Yeah,” Max barely responded. “Well no, actually.”

“What’s wrong? What happened?” Gio said, moving closer to Max again to provide some form of comfort.

Max looked at Gio with a small, sad smile. His eyes held no emotion and his face was drained of any colour.

“My apartment was broken into and I pretty much lost everything.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> if you want chapters sooner rather than later, please leave a comment, they make me update faster ;)


	6. Broken

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I know it's been a while since I updated, but this was kind of put on the back burner whilst I dealt with some pretty challenging personal matters. But I'm back... for now. Hope you enjoy!
> 
> p.s. I didn't proof-read this, so please ignore the spelling/grammar mistakes (sorry).

Max stood in the middle of his apartment, hands hanging by his side. It felt like his whole world was crumbling down around him. Hundreds of dollars’ worth of drag was ruined, there was shattered glass everywhere, his furniture was destroyed, and the cost to replace everything would take him months, if not years, to pay off. He could barley afford to live as it was. He was fucked.

 He could hear his landlord talking down the hallway, on the phone to the police or something. The alarm had finally been turned off, but the damage was already done. His home was ruined. Even though he hated this apartment so much, it still held so many happy memories.

Max could deal with what was lost, he didn’t care about what was stolen, but he couldn’t deal with the fact that he no longer felt safe in his own home. He stared at the wall opposite him, his eyes tracing the angry red letters left by his unwanted visitors. _FUCKING FAG._ The paint was still wet and dripped onto the carpet, all over the shattered glass. It looked like a murder scene to Max, but that was the least of his concerns at the moment.

Max went around and picked up whatever could be salvaged. Most of his drag was in cardboard boxes on the floor which had been rummaged through and spray painted on, essentially ruined. His makeup was the only drag that was stolen, but that would still cost him a pretty penny to replace. A few of his favourite outfits would have to be thrown out, and there was a wig or two that couldn’t be saved. He sighed as he looked at where his TV set used to sit, he didn’t even want to think about how much that would cost him to replace.

His phone buzzed in his jacket pocket and he struggled to pull it out with his arms practically full. “Hello?” He huffed, not really in the mood to talk to anybody right now. He placed the phone between his ear and shoulder as he continued to pick things up.

“Hey girl…” Monet’s voice trailed off on the other side of the line. “I heard what happened.”

“Who told y- Aquaria?” Max asked, his voice quiet and tired.

“Yeah, she rang me. She seemed pretty worried, said you left without really telling her anything and you looked like someone killed your cat,” Monet said.

Max scoffed as he dumped the contents in his arms on his bed, grabbing the phone from between his ear and shoulder so he could properly yell into it if he needed to. “Yeah she would say something like that. I just had to get out of that club, it started to feel to claustrophobic,” Max replied, his mind immediately to how _un_ -claustrophobic he had felt in the booth with Gio. A shiver ran down his body.

“Look, why don’t you just stay at my place for a while?” Monet said. “It’ll be fun! And you can stay as long as you like, until you find a new place or until the landlord fixes the place up.”

“Thanks Mon, and honestly I don’t think I’ll come back here,” Max sighed, looking around his destroyed apartment. He couldn’t bear the thought of staying another night here. “I’m sick of my couch mysteriously smelling like chicken shit.”

Monet howled at the other end of the line, her contagious laugh fillings Max’s ear and then his apartment as he held the phone away from his face.

“I’ll be over in about an hour or so, okay?” Max said, smiling.

“Sure thing, girl,” Monet breathed, laughter still evident in her tone. “I’ll make up the couch for you.”

“Thank you. So much,” Max said before hanging up.

He went and got a duffle bag that was stuffed at the top of his wardrobe, stuffing as much boy stuff in it as he could. He would come back and collect the drag tomorrow, he couldn’t even look at it right now.

He left his apartment in a flurry, not even glancing at the bright red writing on the wall.

* * *

 

He arrived at Monet’s with a duffle bag and a bottle of wine, and Monet welcomed him with a hug.

“What did the landlord say?” Monet said, taking the bottle of wine off Max and heading straight to the kitchen to open it.

“Well the police arrived straight after I left, and my landlord said that they think it was a targeted attack. I was the only one on my in my building that was broken into, and the nature of the ‘evidence’ they left behind is the biggest indication.” Max said, happily taking the full glass of wine that Monet offered and downing it in two sculls.

“Do you want to talk about it?” Monet said, voice soft.

“No, but I would like some more wine, please,” Max replied, shaking his wine glass side to side and smiling at Monet.

* * *

 

It had been a week since the break in, a week since Monet let Max stay at her place, a week since Max had his sanity. Max knew Monet was a bit of a handful at times, but he hadn’t anticipated how crazy she actually was.

Max was awoken nearly every single day by Monet’s larger than life singing. Yes, she had a gift for opera singing, but damn if Max didn’t know how the neighbours hadn’t had her kicked out of the building yet. Not to mention she was doting, almost too doting, to the point where Max couldn’t even shift positions in his seat without her asking if he was okay.

And to add fuel to the fire, Max hadn’t performed in the last week, so he had no creative outlet what so ever. His days were filled with drafting and editing articles for the many online news outlets he wrote for (a task that was difficult to complete due to Monet’s loud nature), and his nights were consumed by the English and Wolof classes he taught. His life had become mundane again, in just one week. Max hated it.

Max had finally finished editing his last article for the week and had just settled into the corner of the couch with a Sylvia Plath novel, revelling in the peace and quiet, when Monet burst through the front door, laughing her ass off about something stupid that Bob was spurting behind her. Max groaned quietly and dropped his chin onto his chest.

“Cracker!” She called, throwing her shopping bags on the floor and going to give Max a hug. She wrapped her arms around his shoulders and squeezed as tight as she could. “How’s my little Maxie going?” she cooed, alcohol apparent on her breath. 

“Well, ‘Maxie’ would be even better if you didn’t refer to him as that hideous nickname,” Max groaned, wiggling in his spot to try break free of Monet’s iron clad grasp.

“Oh, lighten up Cracker, we know your apartment was broken into but stop acting like a sore butt,” Bob said flippantly, before him and Monet burst into giggles, repeating ‘butt’ and laughing harder every time.

Max got up from his seat. He just needed some _quiet_. Just a few moments of silence before he went entirely insane and decided to throw himself out of Monet’s window. “I’m going to take a shower,” Max mumbled, his voice muffled.

He stalked halfway down the hallway before Bob called out from behind him. “Cracks,” He said. Max paused his steps but didn’t turn around. “Aquaria has been asking about you, said you aren’t returning any of her calls. The kid is worried about you… so please just, I don’t know, send him a text? He looks like a kicked puppy every night you don’t turn up at the club.”

Max sighed, replying with a small ‘yep, no problem’ before heading into the bathroom. He closed the door behind him, before leaning his head back against it and squeezing his eyes shut. Despite how horrible and busy this week had been, Max hadn’t been able to get Giovanni off his mind. The smell of his cologne, his warm brown eyes, his laugh in his ear. He was mesmerising. And Max wasn’t good enough for him.

After the other week, Max couldn’t care less about the age gap. Giovanni didn’t seem to mind, so why should he? But the last week has only proven to Max that he is not worthy of Gio, so there was no point in pursuing him.

What kind of grown man allows a bunch of vandals (probably teenagers) ruin his stability to the point that he can’t even go back to his old apartment to collect his things and sends his friends to do it instead. Max is a coward, and he has a black belt in karate, so it was hard for him to admit that to himself.

Also, Max is way too far deep into his own mind that he can’t fathom allowing another person in, and he has tried in the past, it just doesn’t work. Gio might not understand him and try to tell him ‘just think positive’ (like his ex did, which drove Max crazy), or just turn a blind eye to Max’s emotional needs and purely use him for sex.

And who knows, maybe Gio isn’t mature enough for him. Max is way past his partying years, despite the fact that he does work in a nightclub for his main source of income. He’s in bed not even an hour or two after his set and will only have a maximum of five drinks a night. He’s responsible like that (even though Bob and Monet call it boring).

Max stood in the shower, letting the water cascade over him. He tried to escape the constant thoughts of Gio running through his mind and tried to pretend he was in some early 2000’s, teenage, hetero, romcom that had some dramatic scene in the pouring rain where the guy finally confessed his love to the girl. But he was interrupted by a thumping base that emanated from the wall beside him.

Monet and Bob were playing Nicki Minaj obnoxiously loud through Monet’s new speaker set, which was certain to cause the neighbours to complain or even call the police. Max rolled his eyes and scrubbed some shampoo through his hair.

He needed to move out and find a new place as soon as possible.

* * *

 

“Cracker?” A soft voice sounded from behind Max. “Is that you?”

Max turned around, glancing around the crowded café to find the source of the voice. His eyes landed on Katelyn, her smile as bright as ever.

“Hey! I thought that was you! How are things? I haven’t seen or heard from you in ages,” Katelyn said, smile never leaving her happy face.

“Yeah, I’m okay,” Max replied, taking a step forward as the line in front of him moved. “I’ve been flat out with class at the moment, so I haven’t really been at the clubs much.”

“That’s right! You teach French…..?” Katelyn guessed, her eyebrows raising in question.

“Wolof, it’s spoken in Senegal,” Max said smiling.

“Oh God, I wouldn’t have ever remembered that!” Katelyn laughed, her cheeks going red with embarrassment.

“It’s okay,” Max reassured her. “I’m surprised that you even remember that I taught, not many people do…”

“Well, I’m a teacher too, so our kind need to help each other out,” Katelyn said with a wink before elbowing Max lightly in the arm.

“Do you want to join me for coffee? I was going to sit and read my book, but I’d much rather the company,” Max said, hope filled his voice.

“Of course, I will!” Katelyn said, clapping her hands together excitedly. They placed their orders and took their seats, sitting in the quietest part of the café.

“So… Gio told me you had your apartment broken into the other week,” Katelyn said, looking down at her hands that sat clasped on the table. Max took a deep breath through his nose, the bright red words and shattered glass flashing through his mind. “How’s everything going?”

“It’s alright, I’m staying with Monet at the moment and she’s been… helping me as best as she can. She collected all my stuff from the apartment and stuff, so that’s nice,” Max replied, eyes not focusing on one specific spot.

“That’s nice, she’s a good friend,” Katelyn replied softly.

“She really is…” Max trailed off.

“Have you talked to Gio recently-”

“I’m not a coward, right?” Max asked abruptly, cutting Katelyn off.

She blinked in shocked for a couple of seconds before responding. “No, no, of course not. Why would you think that?”

“I don’t know,” Max shook his head. “I can’t even stay in my own apartment for fear that those dickheads might come back and do something, especially if they know I’m home. It was targeted, you know, so they’re either some grade-a assholes that like scaring people or they genuinely hate gay people and want me dead.”

Max took a deep breath to calm himself down, not even able to bring himself to look at Katelyn’s surprised face.

Katelyn smiled warmly at Max, placing her hand over his on the table. “Look Cracker, it’s okay that you feel this way, it’s perfectly justified. I’d feel the same way, and so would anyone else in your situation. Okay?”

Max nodded his head, looking into Katelyn’s green eyes and seeing the sincerity that they held. “Okay,” He responded quietly.

“And you don’t have to go back, not ever, your landlord shouldn’t expect you to,” Katelyn said.

Max snorted, sitting back in his seat. “Yeah I don’t think that’s going to happen, I’m probably going to be back there sooner than I’d thought.”

“Why?” Katelyn asked.

“Because Monet is driving me crazy,” Max sighed. “As much as I love her and appreciate what she has done for me over the last week or so, I swear if I stay one more night there, I’m going to go crazy.”

Katelyn looked lost in thought for a moment, before a shit eating grin took over her face. “Why don’t you come stay with me? I’d be more than happy to host you for a while.”

Max was shocked, this was the last thing he expected. “No, Katelyn, I can’t. That’s too much to expect-”

“Don’t be silly, you can stay on the futon until you find yourself a new place,” Katelyn said, her tone excited. “C’mon, it’ll be like having a slumber party every night!”

“…. Okay.” Max relented. “But only for a couple weeks…”

“This is going to be so much fun! Do you have the afternoon free? We can move some of your stuff over now if you want?” Katelyn asked.

Max actually had a shit tonne to do today, but the idea of moving out of Monet’s place was far too appealing. “Yeah, I’m free.”

“Awesome! This is going to be great!” Katelyn said enthusiastically.

The server placed their coffee’s down in front of them, and Max took his drink straightaway taking a big gulp. He needed the caffeine to process what has just happened.

He couldn’t decide if this was the best idea ever or the worst decision he had ever made.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> leave a comment and or kudos, please! you know it's my only source of nutrition ;)


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